


I Can't Hate You, You're Too Cute

by fringegapphil



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, but its okay it gets better, they kind of start off on a bad foot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-09
Updated: 2015-07-09
Packaged: 2018-04-08 10:21:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,534
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4301055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fringegapphil/pseuds/fringegapphil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil caught Dan keying his car, and well, he wasn't happy. </p>
            </blockquote>





	I Can't Hate You, You're Too Cute

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I found this "meet ugly" thing floating around on tumblr (mine is fringegapphil (shameless plug and [Shameless Link](http://fringegapphil.tumblr.com/post/123602525895/i-cant-hate-you-youre-too-cute)) and I decided to do this one--  
> "You’re the bastard who keeps parking right in front of my house so I retaliated by keying your car and you caught me AU" also I dont know what cars are, what are cars? I just chose the first small car I could think off. Anyways this story is a little fast paced and crazy but I hope you enjoy~

Everyday. Every single day for the past two months I see that stupid white Honda Fit sitting outside of _my_ driveway, blocking my path out. It annoys me to no end that I have to maneuver around this stupid car, because my neighbor can't park in their own driveway. No wonder really, it's full of shit that never seems to move. 

I huff and pull the blinds closed as I walked back to my table to grab my coffee. Today I had another stupid meeting at the horrible job I was just so lucky to have. I was an assistant to the assistant of the CEO of the building. My "boss" apparently needed someone who could run faxes for her. Though, that's never what she actually asks me to do. She just orders me around, making me grab her fucking coffee for her when she 'doesn't have enough hands'. Sure. 

I run my hands through my dark brown hair, taking a giant swig of my semi-cold coffee. I gag at the taste, since cold coffee tastes absolutely disgusting. This is just how my day is going to go I guess. I quickly grab my shoulder-strap briefcase that is way to big for me, and make my way out of my house. Once I reach my car, I roll my eyes at the fact that I have to go _around_ this dumb car again. It's like a fucking obstacle course everyday. 

I manage to not hit the front end of the dumb white car as I back out, silently cursing my idiot neighbor. I floor my car and pull away from my house before I do something stupid. 

\---

Today was hell at the office. My boss made me a lap dog, fetching her different things and then yelling at my if I got the wrong thing. I hate this job, but I need the money to live, and it's the only decent paying job I've found. My bad mood just got worse when I noticed the white car was still sitting in front of my house. I glared ahead and jerked to a stop, nearly t-boning this car. My head was not on right, and I was angry and not thinking straight. I jumped out of my car and pulled the keys out of the transmission. I slammed the car door, and made my way over to the car that always annoying me. I scanned the area quickly before scraping my keys across the smooth surface of the car. My key slide across the finish and left a dull black mark in its wake. I smiled as I felt my mood getting better, because I was taking it out on _something_.

I had scratched up about half of the car door, the finish ruined on it now. My brain recognized the opening of a door, but my brain was in autopilot right now. 

"Hey!" I heard someone scream in front of me. My head shot up as I made eye contact with the blue eyed boy not to far away from me. "What are you doing!?" His eyes were narrowing and he began to rush forward. I was frozen in place. In the two months this boy has lived next door, I haven't seen him at all. Now, as he stands before me- glaring- I take in how he looks. 

I say boy, because he doesn't look like a man. Yes, he's tall, almost taller than me, and he has a subtle 5 o'clock shadow look going on. He has to be in his twenties, but it's his clothes that make me question that. He's wearing a fucking Pokemon t-shirt and bright green pajama bottoms. He looks like a toddler, though he's much cuter than one. 

"I-I um i," I stutter out as his eyes bore into mine. They are so blue, with just tiny hints of green running through them. 

"Why are you keying my car?" He grabbed my hand and pulled it away from his car, furrowing his brows. He then took a look at the damage I had done. "Oh man, that's gonna cost so much to fix!" He dropped my hand and pushed me aside to assess the damage. 

After I had come out of a daze, I looked over to him. He was kneeling on the ground, running his fingers along the grooves my keys had left on the door. 

"I-I'm uh," I managed out before he glanced up at me. "I'm sorry." He rolled his eyes and stood up. 

"Well, this isn't the greatest way to meet my neighbor, but whatever. My name is Phil Lester." He stuck out his hand and I gently took it. I couldn't quite believe my ears, he was seriously not mad? I dropped his hand and stared at him, confused. He must have sensed my confusion because he continued. "Look i know I've probably been a pain because I've been parking in front of your driveway. I get that. I didn't ask if I could park here, honestly I was kinda asking for this." He motioned to his car. "But you could've just asked me to move it." He giggled. 

"Uh yeah." I said, scratching the back of my neck. I began to just stare at him, taking in his angled features and his similarly styled hair. I zoned out, full on staring at him, when I realized I hadn't heard what he just said. "What?" I blurted out, shaking my head to bring myself back. 

"I asked what your name is, you didn't tell me." 

"Oh, it's Dan, Dan Howell." I mumbled. 

"Dan Howell." He contemplated. "You should name one of your children wolf." He said, laughing. He lent back against his car and stared right back at me. 

"Wolf?" I asked, confused. What is this guy on about? 

"Yeah! Wolf." He said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He rolled his eyes. "Wolf Howell?" He motioned with his hands to emphasize what he was saying. 

It took me a second, then I got his little joke. "Oh my god." I pinched the bridge of my nose, but I was giggling along with him. This handsome stranger, who I feel I could possibly get along with. 

"Hey, why don't you come over for some tea?" Phil asked, smiling. I looked around at my car, which sat halfway up on the curb, and halfway in the street.

"I'd love to, let me just fix my car situation." Phil laughed, then nodded and headed towards his house. 

"Just come right in, no need to knock." He called over his shoulder. I smiled and turned back to my car, getting in and putting my keys in the transmission. I quickly moved my car around Phil's and parked it. 

\--

I was sitting with Phil now. After having tea and talking, I realized how much we have in common. We like the same music, movies, celebrities, video games and a whole bunch more. I was really starting to like this guy, I mean how could I not? He's exactly like me. 

 He told me he wouldn't call the police on me or whatever about the car. Though I did offer to pay for the damage and he was more than willing to except.

Phil has a job too, I found out. He does some weird thing on YouTube, basically making videos and earning money somehow. I'm still a bit confused by it. Though I was sure to make a mental note that his name was 'AmazingPhil' on YouTube. I was most definitely going to watch his videos. 

And, after all the talking, I found out why he has all his stuff in the driveway. He was kicked out about three months ago by his parents, because, get this, he's gay. Which, shocked me of course, but also make my heart rate double. Honestly I hadn't ever _wanted_ to be with a guy. But this one, this one was special. He was something completely different and I liked it. 

"Phil I'm sorry about your parents, they should except you no matter what." I put my hand on his arm and moved a little closer to him. 

"It's alright, I mean it's their loss. Honestly. I'm okay with who I am, and if they aren't...well I can't get dragged down by that." He smiled, but I could see a hint of hurt behind it. I pulled him into a hug. It's strange to say that I've felt as though I've know Phil for years. 

He hugged back quickly and we stayed like that for a while. He was really comfortable and warm, and I didn't feel like moving and I guess he didn't either. 

Though when he pulled back, and looked me in the eyes I nearly swooned. Phil was gorgeous, I'll freely admit. His stark black hair contrasts his beautiful bright blue eyes nicely. His skin, which was pale as ever, was soft and radiated heat and made me feel at home. That's when I noticed his little blush. Could he possibly be thinking the same things? I smiled gently and moved my hand to his. A friendly gesture, but if he wanted it to be more, I was all for it. 

Phil turned to pick up the mugs, bringing them into the kitchen quickly. Not before I noticed his bright red blush across his face. I chuckled under my breath and followed him into the kitchen. 

"You know Phil, I don't know what it is, but I feel like I've known you for a while." He didn't turn to me as he washed the mugs, but I heard the smile in his voice as he replied. 

"Thought I was the only one." 

I giggled, something I think I do far to much around Phil for it to be normal. I stood behind him and rested my head on his shoulder. He quickly jerked away and grabbed his neck. 

"Your hair is really funny feeling on my neck." He said, smiling and 'booping' my nose. Wow, I feel like an old married couple. He turned back to his dishes and I made sure to tickle the back of his neck so he would jump again. "Stop Dan!" He said, but he didn't mean it. He was laughing along with me. 

When he heard me laughing, he grabbed some of the suds from the sink and placed them on my head. "Really Phil? Really?" I laughed, shaking the bubbles off my head. Phil just stared at me. I stared right back. His eyes were intense, but not like earlier. Earlier they were angry, now...I don't know what they are. I gave him a crooked smile and he returned it. 

"You still have some in your hair." He mused, reaching forward and running his hand through my hair. Now, I'm not an expert, but if there were actually suds in my hair, doing that would just spread them. Either way, I leaned into his touch, and closed my eyes. Which I immediately shot back open, because how weird would that look. 

When I opened them, I noticed he hadn't dropped his intense gaze. His hand was still in my hair, and his eyes only flickered down for a moment but i noticed the small movement. I shuffled closer to him. 

"Phil." I said. 

"Dan," he responded. 

"If you are going to kiss me, now is the time to do it." 

"Okay." And he closed the gap between our lips. 

You know how in movies, they describe it like fireworks? Well this kiss wasn't anything like that. Fireworks are quick and explosive. This was slow and warm and really, _really_ nice. 

Phil had wrapped his arms around my neck and deepened the kiss. I held his waist with both hands and smiled into the kiss. "Talk about moving fast. I was keying your car not 3 hours ago." I giggled after moving back. He laughed along with me. 

"Yeah well, it's felt like years, somehow." He rested his forehead against mine. We both smiled, just enjoying each other for now. 

\---

A few days later, after Phil had gotten his car fixed, I began helping him with the things outside. His stuff was heavy, so heavy even with both of us holding both ends, it was _still_ heavy. Now I get why he didn't move it inside. 

Now his dresser was inside and all his other huge furniture that he couldn't get in by himself. He smiled at me, and closed the door. 

"Thanks for helping me move that crap inside Dan." He said. 

"Of course, I mean you need somewhere to put your car. So someone doesn't key it or something." I tried to say without giggling, but ended up bursting into laughter. 

"Yeah laugh, it came out of your paycheck," he retorted, which made me fake frown but laugh anything. 

"Okay okay." I laughed, "idiot." I mumbled under my breath. 

"I heard that!" 

Phil walked over to me and wrapped his arms around me so I couldn't move.   
"You think I'm an idiot? Huh?" He started tickling me and I swear I've never laughed so hard. We actually ended up on the ground, lying on top of each other and laughing. He kissed me gently on the lips. I could get use to this. 

\---

A few weeks, months, years later me and Phil didn't have separate houses anymore. We lived in a flat in _London_ I kid you not. It was amazing, and it had the nicest view. 

Phil got me into YouTube. I watched all his videos through probably a hundred times, and I loved them. He told me to make videos too, because he said people would find me funny. I doubted him, but here I am, making videos and having over 4 million people watching them. 

Me and Phil were still together, even after all these years. We had changed a lot over the years, out hair shorter and our smiles bigger. We hadn't told the fans, but they didn't need to know. We were happy, and that's all that mattered.

Today was just a relaxed day. Phil and I were sitting together (cuddling actually) and just enjoying each other. 

"Remember how we met?" I asked out of the blue. 

"Yeah, you were keying my car you bastard." Phil laughed and kissed the side of my head. 

"Now look at us." I gestured around, our life has certainly changed. 

"I knew from day one that we were gonna grow old together. You know that right?" Phil said, and I furrowed my brows.

 "I didn't. I would've thought you hated me." I queried. 

"Well I didn't like you at first, but you were so small to me and so cute. I remember you tripped over your words and blushed. It's like you were a teenager or something." He leaned his head back, remembering. "Then you apologized and we hung out together and found out our similarities, and the rest is history." He giggled.

"You cheesy fuck." I laughed. 

"That's me." He kissed me then. 

Funny to think we wouldn't have met if I hadn't keyed his car. That damn white Honda Fit.


End file.
